I thought this was an onion article

A few more acting classes might help guys. I know it’s hard being convincing when you’re trying to dab up a genocidal regime.

Matthew 6:5-8

“5 And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. 7 And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”

People are crazy

Your country has fallen to a foreign power guys. You are their Vassel.

"Opium of the people"

Acting is shite

So where do I sign up for some of this? Do they pay you straight away? Is it an end of the month thing? I'm good either way.

Has anyone noticed how it's so much easier to lie when your eyes are closed?