Are today's insane 'aesthetic' lifestyle expectations financially destroying young earners, or are we all just bad with money

One of my friends recently opened up to me about how stressed he is with money, and his experience really hit hard. He makes about 50k in a normal corporate job — nothing fancy, no six-figure tech salary. By all traditional measures he’s doing “fine,” but he feels broke and stressed all the time. He told me the pressure comes from how much the “minimum acceptable life” has changed.It’s no longer enough to just have a roof, a car, and food. Now it feels like you’re expected to:

  • Live in a trendy, Instagram-worthy apartment in a nice walkable area (not some basic place far from everything)
  • Keep up with the latest gadgets — new iPhone every year, AirPods, smartwatch, laptop, etc.
  • Have multiple subscriptions (streaming services, gym, meal delivery, etc.)
  • Travel a few times a year because “experiences > things”
  • Eat out or order in regularly — cooking every night feels like a chore
  • Invest in self-care, skincare, fitness, and “mental health” stuff that all adds up

He says social media makes it look so easy and normal. Everyone his age seems to be living this aesthetic lifestyle, going on trips, decorating their places nicely, and posting about it. Meanwhile, he’s budgeting hard but still feels like he’s barely keeping up.He doesn’t have massive debt (just student loans), he doesn’t blow money on stupid stuff, and he tries to be responsible. Yet he constantly worries about money and feels behind. Is this just normal lifestyle creep and young people today are spoiled?
Or have the expectations of what a “good young adult life” should look like become financially unrealistic for average earners in 2026? Would especially love to hear from people around 25–32 who are in similar situations — what’s your take? Appreciate any honest takes.

Comments

oofouchowwie•3 months ago•5

That's an insane amount of money to blow on impressing others. 

Self-care and fitness doesn't have to cost anything. Eating out that often isn't even healthy. Buying new gadgets before the old ones break is bad for the planet. Traveling an hour out of the city for a nice hike feels about as nice as going on an international vacation since it's more about the change of pace.

Isn't being financially responsible and sustainable worth admiring as is?

bercement•3 months ago•3

Idk, this all sounds silly to me. Yeah, sometimes it does suck to see people going on international trips when I would like to be doing the same with my time and money, but the FOMO is temporary. You could choose one or two categories out of that list that you actually want and be fine with that. I couldn'tcare less about new technology. All I have is an iphone 11, an old laptop, and a TV I got as a housewarming gift, and the money from that I can put into self care (I take a lot of classes, keep my hair done, facials, etc).

It sounds like he needs to also build a better sense of self / self-esteem. There's no reason to feel like you need to stay in the rat race if you develop a life that brings you happiness from an inner place.

Purple_Rayn_22•3 months ago•2

Yeah I think you have a point. The ‘basic’ standard of living these days is not basic. It’s a car on tick, new phone, at least one foreign holiday per year, eating out regularly and having at least some designer clothes. People live beyond their means and wonder why they’re skint.

I think the ability to buy everything on credit gives the allusion that everyone is doing well financially on the outside. You can have a new car/phone even furniture and pay monthly. Monthly payments and subscriptions add up fast.

People need to be more disciplined with their money.

Mother-Moose-5360•3 months ago•2

Some people have money from wherever - better income from their job, family, whatever.

Other people live paycheck to paycheck AND run up credit card bills trying to keep up. I would not want to be one of those people.

Also I'd say. We often see the sum of everyone's experiences, not just one person who "has it all" (tho they do exist). PICK WHAT YOU REALLY LIKE AND PUT YOUR TIME MONEY AND ENERGY INTO THAT. If having the latest gadget is really important to you then maybe don't order a private taxi for your burrito.

Lastly, the economy is kinda wrecked, so no one should kick themselves. We place way too much social value on money, income, etc. It's a game you don't have to play, even if it feels like it is.

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TerryMungbean•3 months ago•1

It would be interesting to see a break down of how much is spent on the various things… essential vs frivolous etc. 

Personally I think most of that is daft. I do recognise the power of social media and the effects it can have on an individual, It’s a powerful drug but expected to have ! If you recognise that you can’t afford your life and also recognise the things that are draining you surely it’s time to address it. 

DopamineCard•3 months ago•1

All the people selling that aesthetic are making money doing it. Guaranteed.

That’s why influencers and affiliate marketing are so big these days. Seeing all of this media with people living these lives induces FOMO, which is exactly what your friend is experiencing.

Young people today aren’t spoiled. They’re just subject to a much different and more organic type of marketing. It used to be easy to spot ads. Now, almost everything is meant to make you spend money.

Tezcatlipoca1993•3 months ago•1

You can decide to opt out from all these things. Nobody is forcing you into keeping up with these trends. FOMO is very strong but F them. Much better to invest your time and money in other ways, especially saving and investing. Not saying you need to live like a Franciscan monk but leading an intentionally austere lifestyle does free up resources to be allocated to more worthy pursuits other than impressing others.

ContentClimate9051•3 months ago•1

It’s both, but mostly expectations.

That “minimum lifestyle” your friend is chasing isn’t normal, it’s curated. Social media shows the top 10% moments and people treat it like a baseline.

At the same time, yeah people are bad with money. Subscriptions, eating out, constant upgrades, all small leaks that add up fast.

The real issue is trying to live a high-consumption lifestyle on an average income. That math just doesn’t work.

You either earn more or lower the standard. Most people try to avoid both and stay stressed.

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